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California Funnies
Best State Attractions, Activities and Events!
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California News Alerts:
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Northern California

* Clear Lake * Humboldt * Lassen * Mendocino * Modoc * Mt Shasta * Redwood Coast * Shasta Lakes

Bay Area

* Contra Costa * Marin * Napa Valley * Oakland * San Francisco * San Jose * San Mateo * Solano * Sonoma Valley

Gold Country / Sierras

* Amador * Calaveras * Colusa * Inyo * Lake Tahoe * Mono * Oroville * Placerville * Plumas * Roseville * Sacramento * Sonora * Yolo * Yuba City

Central California

* Bakersfield * Central Coast * Fresno * Madera * Marysville * Merced * Modesto * Monterey Bay * Santa Barbara * Stockton * Ventura * Visalia

Balboa Park San Diego
Southern California

* Antelope Valley * Imperial Valley * Inland Empire * Long Beach * Los Angeles * Mojave Desert * Orange Co * Palm Springs * San Diego Metro * San Diego North * San Fernando Valley * San Gabriel Valley * Santa Clarita

Planning a California Trip? Check this section for special offers and discount rates for travel, lodging, guided tours, theme parks, dining, shopping and much more.

Meet California Singles
60,000 New Listings Daily! Free Trial - California
eHarmony - California
LavaLife - California

Non-Sequitur - 11-Sep-2010
Discount Vacation Rentals

"In California when you pull someone over, you have to have an ID with two pictures -- before plastic surgery and after." -- California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger

CalWatchDog - Political Cartoons of California


    The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway.
    You park in driveways and drive on parkways
    You were born somewhere else.
    You know how to eat an artichoke.
    The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.
    Your car has bullet-proof windows.
    Left is right and right is wrong.
    Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.
    Your mouse has only one ball.
    You need a new TV, you can run down to the local riot and pick one up.
    You dive under a desk whenever a large truck goes by.
    You can't find your other earring because your son is wearing it.
    You drive to your neighborhood block party.
    Your family tree contains "significant others."
    Your cat has its own psychiatrist.
    You don't exterminate your roaches, you smoke them.
    You see 25 lawyers chasing an ambulance.
    More than clothes come out of the closets.
    When "the Dead" are best live.
    You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.
    Your blind date turns out to be your ex-spouse.
    More money is spent on facelifts than on diapers.
    You pack shorts and a T-shirt for skiing in the snow, and a sweater and a wetsuit for the beach.
    When you can't schedule a meeting because you must "do lunch."
    Your children learn to walk in Birkenstocks.
    Rainstorms or thunder are the lead story for the local news.
    You'll reluctantly miss yoga class to wait for the hot tub repairman.
    When all highways into the state say: "no fruits."
    All highways out of the state say: "Go back."


    Your co-worker tells you he/she has 8 body piercings...and none are visible.
    You make over $250,000 and still can't afford a house.
    Your child's 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.
    You've been to more than one baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
    A really great parking space can move you to tears.
    You can't remember ... is pot illegal?
    A low-speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
    You assume every company offers domestic partner benefits, a fab exercise facility, and tofu takeout.
    You're thinking of taking an adult class but you can't decide between aromatherapy and conversational Mandarin.
    Your best friends just named their twins after her acting coach and his personal trainer.
    It's sprinkling and there's a report on every news station about "STORM WATCH '99."
    The three-hour traffic jam you just sat through wasn't caused by a horrific 9 car pile-up, but by everyone slowing to rubberneck at a lost shoe laying on the shoulder.
    You can't remember ... is pot illegal?

Sports Events

2010 MLB Baseball Season
Dodgers, Padres, Giants, Angels, A's. Come see your favorite team in action.

Buy NFL Tickets at RazorGator

    Tour California Golf Resorts
    Find our top picks for the best in California Golfing Adventures including Palm Springs, Carlsbad, Torrey Pines and much more. See the news on California's major PGA and LPGA event schedule.

    California Runners Guide
    Find major race events, festivals, track clubs, cool running gear and much more.

    Concert Tour

    Major Performers Now On Tour
    Comedy, Classical, Latin, R&B, Jazz, Gospel, Country, Rock & Pop
    All Genres of Great Entertainment - Book your seat while you still can! The list of must-see acts currently touring continues to grow:
    Van Halen World Tour
    Annie Lennox Tour
    Hannah Montana Tour - See Teen Idol Miley Cyrus perform as herself and as Hannah Montana, Live!
    Bruce Springsteen and The E Street Band
    Many, many more celebrity acts are now tour - check here for latest listings.

    Theater Tour

    Big Theater Productions
    Broadway, Las Vegas, Hollywood, and other major locations. Popular hits currently playing include Wicked, Mary Poppins, Lion King, Mamma Mia, Phantom of the Opera, Les Miserables, Legally Blond, Spamalot.
    Mamma Mia - Rock Musical based on the music of Abba.
    Phantom of the Opera - Andrew Lloyd Webbers most popular production yet returns to Orange County Performing Arts Center Mar-Apr 2008.

    Family Theater Productions
    Popular family shows include Hannah Montana, Ringling Bros Circus, Disney Ice Shows, and more
    High School Musical - Disney TV - The Music in You, a backstage look at the making of a high school play
    The Wiggles - Get ready to wiggle with Sam, Murray, Jeff, Anthony and their friends Dorothy, Wags, Henry and Captain Feathersword
    Sesame Street Live - Meet Elmo and your favorite TV Characters.

    Wildlife & Nature Tour

    California Coastal National Monument
    Established in 2000, the CCNM runs the entire length of the California coast and encompasses thousands of BLM administered islands, rocks, exposed reefs, and pinnacles above mean high tide. These provide forage and breeding grounds for significant populations of coastal birds and sea mammals.

    California State Beaches
    Surf, swim, sun and play along the great California coastline. Tour the famous Pacific Coast Highway.

    California State Parks
    Encompassing a wide range of wilderness and recreational areas across the state. Camping, hiking, wildlife and much more.

Buy NFL Tickets at RazorGator

    Save up to 50% almost everywhere!

    See Live Events!

    Free Auto Insurance Rate Quote

    California Sports Guide
    The Big Directory of All California Sports

    Baseball, basketball, football, marathons, triathlons, ski resorts, aquatics, equestrian and a whole lot more. Find competative play on all levels - youth, high school, collegiate, amatuer and professional leagues.

California Resort Hotels

California Resort Vacation Escape
Your guide to the best resort accommodations in beautiful California USA.
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