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Non-Sequitur - 11-Sep-2010

"In California when you pull someone over, you have to have an ID with two pictures -- before plastic surgery and after." -- California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger

CalWatchDog - Political Cartoons of California

HOW TO TELL WHEN YOU ARE IN CALIFORNIA

The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway.
You park in driveways and drive on parkways
You were born somewhere else.
You know how to eat an artichoke.
The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.
Your car has bullet-proof windows.
Left is right and right is wrong.
Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.
Your mouse has only one ball.
You need a new TV, you can run down to the local riot and pick one up.
You dive under a desk whenever a large truck goes by.
You can't find your other earring because your son is wearing it.
You drive to your neighborhood block party.
Your family tree contains "significant others."
Your cat has its own psychiatrist.
You don't exterminate your roaches, you smoke them.
You see 25 lawyers chasing an ambulance.
More than clothes come out of the closets.
When "the Dead" are best live.
You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.
Your blind date turns out to be your ex-spouse.
More money is spent on facelifts than on diapers.
You pack shorts and a T-shirt for skiing in the snow, and a sweater and a wetsuit for the beach.
When you can't schedule a meeting because you must "do lunch."
Your children learn to walk in Birkenstocks.
Rainstorms or thunder are the lead story for the local news.
You'll reluctantly miss yoga class to wait for the hot tub repairman.
When all highways into the state say: "no fruits."
All highways out of the state say: "Go back."

HOW TO TELL YOU'RE IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA

Your co-worker tells you he/she has 8 body piercings...and none are visible.
You make over $250,000 and still can't afford a house.
Your child's 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.
You've been to more than one baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
A really great parking space can move you to tears.
You can't remember ... is pot illegal?
A low-speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
You assume every company offers domestic partner benefits, a fab exercise facility, and tofu takeout.
You're thinking of taking an adult class but you can't decide between aromatherapy and conversational Mandarin.
Your best friends just named their twins after her acting coach and his personal trainer.
It's sprinkling and there's a report on every news station about "STORM WATCH '99."
The three-hour traffic jam you just sat through wasn't caused by a horrific 9 car pile-up, but by everyone slowing to rubberneck at a lost shoe laying on the shoulder.
You can't remember ... is pot illegal?

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Concert Tour

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Many, many more celebrity acts are now tour - check here for latest listings.

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Mamma Mia - Rock Musical based on the music of Abba.
Phantom of the Opera - Andrew Lloyd Webbers most popular production yet returns to Orange County Performing Arts Center Mar-Apr 2008.

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High School Musical - Disney TV - The Music in You, a backstage look at the making of a high school play
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Wildlife & Nature Tour

California Coastal National Monument
Established in 2000, the CCNM runs the entire length of the California coast and encompasses thousands of BLM administered islands, rocks, exposed reefs, and pinnacles above mean high tide. These provide forage and breeding grounds for significant populations of coastal birds and sea mammals.

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California Sports Guide
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